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Monday, March 28, 2011

My first post



My name is Antoine and I'm 19 years old. I live in Canada and I really like it.
I have a boyfriend who is called Karim. He lives in France and he is 18 years old. We live a relationship with a lot of distance, I know. That makes 2 months we are together. But I don't know if it's really possible together. To tell the truth, I'm really lost this time. I don't go to College anymore, Karim don't talk to me a lot, I don't know what should I do with Toan ... What I am doing now ? I'm listening a chinese singer called Jay Zhou. I really like his music, there are very calm and beautiful. Best music to listen when you are sad, trust me. 
I'm gonna talk about the problem step by step, it would be easier for me and for you.
First, the College. I don't have any programm. I was in computer science but I stoped it because I really don't wanna stay behind a computer all my life. I need to talk, to meet people ... I really need the social environment. So now I only have four subjects who are English, French, Physical Education and Philosophy. I always sucked in French but ... What happened ?! I was really good ! I had very good marks ! I couldn't believe it. P.E., I always hated it so I didn't come to this subject. I love english, of course. But I missed a lot of classes and I was too afraid to come back to class. So I gave up. I just come to Philosophy. I don't know what should I do because if I don't have 60% at 3 subjects, I can't stay at the College. Actually, I was sick for 2 weeks (and I'm still a bit) and I couldn't go to school. After that, I didn't want to go back school because of lotta exams were waiting me. I will send emails to my teacher to apologize. 

Now, I'm gonna talk about Karim, my boyfriend who lives in France. I know him like about 2 years I think. I don't know exactly the date. 2 months that we are together, and I hurt a lot to keep him with me ! Lotta times he would make me hating him, but when you love someone, he can do whan he wants, the love couldnt change. He was so mean then he gave up and told me that he love me but he is sad because of the distance. That's the same for me, it's very difficult. I don't know what should I do...

Toan, Xiao Toan (little Toan, in Mandarin). I met this boy at Unity, a club that I really like ! I always dance there with all my friends. I know lotta people there. I go to club every weekend with Marie and her friend (RĂ©mi, Sab, Vanou, Max, Kevin, ...). One day, I saw a guy, an asian guy with a pretty face. I thought he was straight, omg, when I told him he was like wtf ?!I'm with homo and guy who look like women, how can you think that ? Haha It was so funny. So I talked with his friend who wanted to kiss me ... But he didn't. I told him that I wanted to know the name of his friend but I didn't understand. Like 2 hours after, I met him with Toan. He told him that I wanted to know him ....OMFG I was like what I have to do know ! I'm so shy =.= I'm really shy xD I didn't want to look at him or anything. He was so cute. I know, there isn't just the beauty. That's why I didn't do anything with him ! I want to know him first of all. He is very .... secret. I can't know what he is thinking. And you know what i'm going to say ; I don't know what should I do...

I had to talk about that because tonight I'm sad and maybe a bit angry because I'm lost and I hate it... But  every person had already felt like that. I hope, all will be okay. I don't want to sleep, just think about my life. If you read it, thank you. You can comment if you want, I'll reply you but just leave you name or email please.

Good night -